March 23

Status: Cankles

For real cankles. Jesus. We FaceTimed Camryn and she said, “Oh my God, I think your kidneys are failing”. Now, to the usual layperson this may concern them but I laughed in the face of possible life threatening issues and I say - nay, nay it’s not my time yet. But seriously, I am concerned. When my ankles are larger than my considerable thighs I think that we should all be concerned. It equatable to a natural disaster. We have walked (I’m not kidding you) 7kms today - in flip flops - 100% humidity, when I’ve had (roughly) 4 cups of salt on the side of multiple margarita glasses. 

Went into Progesso and had a little walk around. Had the best tacos and then hopped back in the Journey to head to the grocery store. “Hopped” is a relative term - in actuality moving seats, opening windows to dispel the 400 degree heat in the van and stacking 1300 pounds of humans into the vehicle. And we head to the grocery store (with Brian complaining that we are only going to liquor stores and grocery stores.....this is NOT his first rodeo - he knows the drill!) and what appears before our wondering eyes? A check stop. Federallis, machine guns, and a blow box. Fuzz passed the test (I was 50/50 - if he failed they took him...and we would have to rock, paper, scissors to see how else would drive or he passes and we keep him. You can understand my conundrum). But after he passed the test he turned the wrong way down a one way street and we had 16 Ferderallis yelling at us to stop. We heard no gunfire so we raced on. I can cross “Out running the Mexican popo” off my Bucket List. 

But grocery shopping in a Mexican grocery store is like playing Russian roulette - “Do you think this spice is chilli powder” or “Is this skimmed milk or whole fat”. Update: it wasn’t chilli powder but it was an acceptable substitute and it wasn’t milk at all - it was sour cream. We came home and played Riffle (Jen won again...) and Brian made the most delicious Chicken Caesar salad with homemade croutons- soooo good. Broke two shot glasses and a bottle of Jameson’s Whiskey (not full but made a hell of a mess in the kitchen). I said it was because the Ricky Gervais god was grumpy because we broke another commandment.